An Old Story: Engineman Shoots Up His Engine

[NW Mailing List]

Right after I hired (61 years ago,) an old Engineman told me a story which
he had heard early in his career, from an Engineman of a previous
generation.  Whether the setting was the Radford Division or the Norfolk
Division, I do not now recall... it may have been in the day before those
Division names even existed.  So turn your mind back to the late 1800s and
let's take a walk down memory lane.

As the story went, this particular old Engineman was cantankerous and hard
to please.  This was very likely the era when Enginemen were assigned to
one particular engine, and used it every day.  This old Engineman was not
pleased with the engine he had been assigned, and fumed at her
performance.  If the aging tea kettle leaked or foamed or stalled, he would
get off, shake his fist and shout curses at the old girl.  When really
distressed, he was known to pull out his pistol and shoot up the old engine.

Well, apparently the old engine had its fill with this abuse, for one day
as the cantankerous old Engineman was down oiling around, the old engine
moved off and ran over him, putting a final end to their bad relationship.

Is this a Paul Bunyon tale, or did the story have a factual basis?  We will
probably never know.  I should  have asked old Tom Kegley, a 1906-hire
Engineman, about the story.  Probably the only other man still around today
who may have heard the story is Mr. Tommy Duncan, now serving as the
Honorable Burgermeister of Austinville, who hired on the railroad seven
years ahead of me.  Hopefully Tommy has his ear to the Wire and will
respond...

-- abram burnett
Mach 1 Matrix Calibration Turnips
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